It is not always possible for me to choose love in the midst of challenging situations, but I can definitely try to soften—soften my voice, my touch, my opinion, and my timetable.
-Rachel Macy Stafford
I’ve had my share of transitions throughout my life. Many of them include moves, locally, within the US (Illinois, Maryland, New Mexico, Texas and California), as well as a few abroad too (France, Peru and Chile). I’ve also lost loved ones, changed jobs, had my share of medical issues including numerous surgeries, and many other major life changes that are too numerous to list here. With any life transitions, there are distinct beginnings and ends, which often hit us with a myriad of different feelings and emotions. It’s important to make time and space to work through these emotions, so they don’t keep you from being able to move forward in your life, when you’re ready.
Let’s start with new beginnings. New beginning may bring feelings such as:
- Joy- for all the exciting new adventures to come
- Sadness- when you’re missing your “old life”
- Grief- surrounding all you’ve left behind
- Relief- if the change actually alleviated stress in your life
- Excitement- around the newness of it all
- Anxiety- when you think about the future and what might happen
- Loneliness- especially if you’ve recently moved and need to start making new friends and creating a new social support system
- Frustration- around unexpected events and issues that have come up
What else would you add here?
Ironically, endings often bring up the same feelings and emotions. Endings may bring feelings such as:
- Joy- if a major stressor is now alleviated in your life
- Sadness- at the end of something big like finishing school
- Grief- around leaving your “old life”
- Relief- if there was a lot of stress in this last phase of life
- Excitement- that something new is around the corner
- Anxiety- about what may or may not happen in the future
- Loneliness- if you’re leaving friends and/or family behind
- Frustration- when life doesn’t go as expected
What else would you add to this list?
Self-care ideas for times of change:
- Talk to a therapist- or restart therapy if you’ve been taking a break
- Meditate- do a quiet or guided meditation
- Read- fiction or nonfiction- whatever brings you joy
- Spend time outdoors- let nature fill you back up when you’re struggling emotionally
- Eat a healthy diet- for your body as you know your body better than anyone else does!
- Journal- either in a written journal or an online one
- Exercise- move your body through yoga, walking, going for a run, etc.
- Connect with loved ones- make a phone call, book a coffee date, etc.
- Stay hydrated- keep water with you at all times
- Focus on mindfulness- work on staying grounded in the present moment by focusing on your five senses
What else helps you in times of change?
If you’re currently going through a transition in your life, big or small, know that you’re not alone. Keep in mind that beginnings and endings are often the hardest transitions to be in throughout our lifetimes. If you are struggling, please reach out to your doctor or a therapist in your area. I’m sending lots of love and compassion your way as you navigate the current transitions in your life.
