Nothing ever goes away until it teaches us what we need to know.
-Pema Chodron
Motherhood overwhelm often shows up when you feel like you have:
- Too much to do and not enough time in the day to do it all.
It can be a real pressure that’s coming from an external place like your mom’s coming for a visit and the house needs to be cleaned, or an internal pressure in that you need your environment neat and orderly so you can function well mentally.
When you are feeling the strain of mom overwhelm, breaking this cycle usually involves asking others for help and support. This can be hard to do if you feel a lot of discomfort around being vulnerable. But, this extra love and support from those who truly care about you can make a world of difference and can even add more joy back into postpartum for you as well.
Unmet Mom Needs
You may not be feeling like yourself right now, especially if there are a lot of unmet needs in your life. These may include:
- A lack of sleep
- Not eating well
- Not staying hydrated
- Not moving enough/lack of exercise
- Needing some alone time
- Needing adult conversations
- Needing more mental stimulation
- Feeling lonely or disconnected from others
- Not scheduling time for self-care
- Needing quiet
- Needing a neat and clean environment
- Missing feeling competent
What are some of your unmet needs right now in postpartum that you’d like to address?
It’s important to prioritize your own needs so you don’t lose yourself in motherhood and forget about the amazing woman you were before having your baby/kids, and the amazing woman you still are today.
Motherhood Busyness
Motherhood busyness, especially in postpartum, is not a badge of honor to be worn! You don’t win an award at the end for being the busiest mom on the block. And yet, how often do we hear about other people’s busyness and how special this makes them? How often do we talk about our own busyness as a way to make us feel important in the world? Let’s dive into this concept of motherhood busyness…
What deeper issues are often going on beneath motherhood busyness?
- Not feeling worthy or like you’re enough
- Feeling disconnected from others
- Relationship problems you aren’t ready to address yet
- Feelings you’re trying to numb like sadness, anxiety, anger, etc.
- Losses you’re not ready to grieve
- Needs that aren’t being fulfilled
- Wants that seem unattainable
- No work-life balance
- Not feeling close to your kids and/or partner
- Not setting clear boundaries with others
So, we want to be looking at motherhood busyness in postpartum (and beyond) as a possible symptom of something deeper that’s going on. Know that it’s not an easy cycle to break. But, the hope is that with this new insight, you’ll start to see this pattern in your life moving forward. That way, when it does show up, you’ll start to intentionally make different choices to better take care of you and your family.