Those who have suffered understand suffering and therefore extend their hand.
I hear quite often in my counseling private practice (and yes, in my personal life too) from people who are not where they thought they would be at this point in their lives. They had certain dreams for their life that did come to fruition. They had certain hopes that didn’t happen. They had goals that weren’t attained. They had expectations that by their current age things in their life were supposed to be different, feel different and look different.
So, what do you do when you find yourself in one of these moments? One of these moments that may have been triggered by a recent birthday, a new grade level in school, another year of marriage, etc.; moments you weren’t thinking would turn out the way they currently are in your life.
- Just sit with the feelings and emotions that come up for you, and see if you can find out what’s going on at a deeper level/find the deeper meaning in your current life circumstances.
- Process your thoughts and feelings in writing to see if this helps simplify and clarify what’s going on.
- Talk it out with a counselor, a family member, friend, etc. Find someone who is supportive and a great listener.
- Seek out people who have been in your shoes and understand what you’re going through.
- Look at your current situation from a place of grief and loss. Give yourself time and space to grieve the loss of where you thought you’d be at this point in your life. Grieving this loss may help you better acknowledge where you are, so that you can start to heal this pain and move forward in the direction you’d like your life to go.
Acknowledge how far you’ve come, both the positive and negative aspects, so you can continue to move forward towards your best life.