Want to be happy? Stop trying to be perfect.
-Brene Brown
Do you struggle with perfectionism in motherhood? Always trying to be the perfect mom to your kids? The perfect person in all facets of your life? Perfectionism can be a very heavy burden to carry, and one that many of us carry. It can leave you feeling like you’re never enough as a person and never doing enough for others, especially as a mom.
Perfectionism is often based in anxiety, and underneath this anxiety are often struggles with self-love, self-worth, self-value, self-esteem, etc. If this is resonating with you, you may want to reach out to a therapist in your area to further explore how perfectionism is playing out in your own life, and ways to start undoing it. Read on for some tips on undoing perfectionism in motherhood, how to help our kids thrive, and daily mantra ideas for moms.
Undoing perfectionism in motherhood may include perfectionism moving to self-acceptance and ultimately to self-compassion and self-love. Also keep in mind here that there may be grief that shows up as you’re working through this process.
Another thing to remember in motherhood is that kids thrive with a combination of love and empathy and safety and structure. Sometimes this simplified reminder can be helpful when we’re feeling overwhelmed by all the stressors of motherhood, especially during the teen years!
Here are some daily mantra ideas for moms… choose the ones that resonate most with you, or change them from day-to-day depending on what you’re needing that specific day:
- Be still
- Be yourself
- Be here now
- You are worthy
- Connection first
- Focus on wellness
- Be true to yourself
- Feeling good from the inside out
- Do what makes your heart happy
- Don’t lose sight of what truly matters
What other daily mantras would you add to this list that are helpful to you in motherhood?
If you’re struggling right now with perfectionism, know that you’re not alone. Perfectionism is a very common struggle, especially for women and in motherhood. Also remember that perfectionism is often a symptom of a deeper issue such as not feeling like you’re enough, feeling like you’re too much or take up too much space, struggles with self-love, self-worth, self-value, self-esteem, etc. Therapy may be very helpful to your healing in these areas as well. I’m sending lots of love and support your way as you start to undo perfectionism in your own life to better take care of you moving forward.
